Knockin' On Heavens Door

In my cubicle we have a special needs person sitting with us.  “Rain man” is a genius when it comes to math, statistics and facts but lacks in the social skills department.  He’s a very nice guy and he also enjoys singing.  I like having him in my cubicle.

Well, one day I was checking his work and spotted some errors.  So I went to his desk to ask him a few questions.

“Hey “Rain man” (FYI: I didn’t really call him this.  I called him by first name but I am referring to him as so only on here), I got a couple questions for you.”  He had his earphones on and he didn’t respond.  So I gently knocked on his desk to get his attention.  *knock knock knock*

He ripped his earphones off and abruptly stood up.  I’m 5’4” and this guy is maybe 6’1”.  He then proceeded to pound his fists on his desk.  *BOOM BOOM BOOM*  His eyes were huge and he said in a very loud, almost shouting voice, “Why do you have to knock on my desk?”

“You had your headphones on and didn’t respond when I was calling your name.  I thought it might get your attention…”  It worked but not in the way I was expecting.  I didn’t think it would anger or upset him.  I totally didn’t think he would react that way.  But I guess with special people you never know.  “Anyways, I got a couple question about your work.  Can you come to my desk so I can show you?”

After I started talking about work, he calmed down and went back to his normal self.  But if you saw my face, you would have seen the fear.  And if you checked my undies, you’d probably find a log or two.  I was seriously ready to take a punch in the face when he stood up.

Medicinal Snacks

So I walked into the lunch room to put my food in the fridge. “The Sheriff” was in there filling up his water jug. He turned around to see me empty the contents of my bag and place them in the fridge.

“Those are some interesting cookies you have there…”

“What? These….”

“Do they have m@riju@n@ in them?”

WTF? This is my boss. And he said this with a smile. I’m wondering if I looked high? What would cause him to ask that? I know I joke around all the time but I’m never under the influence of anything at work. I still have a job to do and I take pride in anything that has my name attached to it.

“Uh….they’re not cookies. It’s soy patties.”

“Oh….the reason I ask is because my mother-in-law….”

I cut him off and asked, “Your mother-in-law bakes weed cookies? WOW!”

“Hahahaha. No, she has medical problems and my wife suggested she take some medicinal m@riju@n@. But she refuses cuz she thinks it bad. And then my wife was telling me about the cookies and brownies and we can just give that to her. She’ll think it’s regular treats.”

“So….you’re not gonna tell her there’s weed in those treats?”

“NOPE! Well, my wife is gonna be the one doing it. It’s up to her. I’m not taking any part of this.”

Hahahaha. We both laughed at this. Giving some 80 yr old lady some bud brownies and not telling her is hilarious to me. And then he said something that really caught me off guard.

“Do you know how easy it is to get a medical card to get the stuff?”

“Uhhh…no. Not really.”

“My wife told me there’s all kinds of ads in the reader where you can get them. Not that I’m condoning this kind of behavior…” The Sheriff then proceeded to pick up The Reader (we have a stash of them in the lunch room for people to read) and quickly found a full page of ads about where to get medicinal cards and how much. We both laughed hysterically about this.

“Well, thanks for the heads up about this…”

That wasn’t awkward at all. Hahahahaha.